14 Lessons on Living – From a teacher on his death bed

With the advent of technology and innovation, our speed in getting things done and going from place to place has gone up drastically. With the speed up, I feel we humans have caved in. Hiding ourselves from something that doesn’t exist and chasing someone in a race that has no end, our true self has always been morphed by none other than thy self!

But along the way, there are people or instances that can bring the best out of you and reveal who you are. As Jim Carrey said in the MUM commencement speech, “Risk being seen in all of your glory”

How often do you come across a book that with all its power, moves and rattles your core and bring all the emotions out? Just like letting a bird free from a cage. My Tuesday with Morrie opened that cage in a noisy food court in a mall. Sitting by myself, I flip every page to find myself slowly unlatching the imaginary cage I built.

The 14 MAK points that shook me are,

1 Let the love in

Often at times we tend to go in search of love, the need for acceptance or the want to be loved in places, things and always in people. Irony is we forget that changing one’s opinion or felling is not possible. What you can do instead is to change your mindset and open your door to let all the love the universe has on you to enter. There are a lot out there who love you.

2 Believe what you feel

The conviction and possibility to achieve comes only when you believe in yourself and by saying so, your feelings as well. Don’t hope for change. Hope won’t get you where you want to go. Believe in being the person you want to be. Believe in your heart for that is the best compass for sailing.

3 Be probed in your direction

I have had the fortune of having a mentor who constantly guides me. Having someone to point direction during your journey will give you the confidence to take on challenges by overcoming your fears. That is the power of a mentor. If you don’t have a mentor, you can always look for people who have left an impact in this world. Books, videos and movies can be vital guiders as well.

4 Believe that you are going to die

You and I, both of us very well know that death is going to be served on a platter for us someday. We know it, we are not that dumb, but how often do you believe that death is for sure coming to you sooner or later. Once you do so, do you think you would be wasting time scrolling through the limitless newsfeed that Facebook gives, or would you rather share a drink with someone and laugh your hearts out? Would planned propaganda that social media gives you matter or would memories made with loved ones matter?

5 Love each other or perish

World has become smaller. With smaller worlds and closer boundaries, people tend to get cornered and when they do so, it’s all survival of the fittest scenario. People become selfish and work towards their own need for safety and desire. Well, what’s the point, death is getting cooked for you. Love each other or you will perish even when you’re alive.

6 Learn to detach

I once had a senior at college tell me, “Arun, whatever you’re doing or you think only you can do, can be done by others”. This was a hard kick on the side for me, but, it is true. Nothing in this world is permanent, even you! When nothing is permanent, then why the attachment? Detach yourself from desire, fear, doubt and greed. Detach to get connected with the bigger picture.

7 Embrace everything

I once asked my mentor that if the need to be rich or wealthy was ego or ambition. “It is not to be thought of that way, for thoughts and deeds matter more than wealth” was the reply I got. With positive thoughts and progressive deeds, you have purpose and confidence in you to embrace what the universe has for you. Take it in!

8 Devote yourself to love others

Often to get to one’s heart or soul, you don’t need any form of selling or marketing to do. All you need is to pay 100% attention and listen to whatever they got to say. We all lag in empathy for the other. Be that person you want so badly and automatically you will have a lot surrounding you. Completely devote yourself.

9 Love is how you stay alive

In life we always have crossroads ahead of us. There is however no left or right directions. You can choose your path either out of love, or out of hate. Choose love for that is the way forward and that is how you stay alive. In this path, you will find happiness, empathy, peace and purpose. This path will not let you die when you are alive.

10 Respect and compromise 

Relationships are for strengthening others and is meant to give you liberation and freedom. To have a loving and lasting relationship, all you have to offer is respect and compromise. Look back and see all kinds of broken relationships in your life. They need not have been that way had you given respect and compromised on few things.

11 Don’t let go too soon and don’t hang on too long

Nature has its way of dealing with changes and evolution is so clear that it has found the perfect balance between letting go too soon and hanging on too long. Unfortunately we humans seem never to get the balance right the very first time. Wisdom plays its role here. Because when you let go too soon, you develop guilt and when you hang on too long you develop greed. Find the balance.

12 Forgive yourself

The hardest thing to do is to overcome yourself and look at someone in the eye and say, “Sorry”.

The one word could alter the way things were or even better could bring peace to yourself. The overdue sorry sometimes could be for yourself as well. Learn to forgive others and particular learn to forgive yourself.

13 Make peace with living

You can be confronted with lot of adversities in life. But you have absolutely no power over the Earth spin or time. Life will go on. To go on with life, you must start making peace with living. Living your life will then be fun.

14 It is never too late.

Age is something one should never repent. Get old, for it is the most beautiful thing that can happen to you. But realise that again you have no control over it and hence no point worrying over the unfinished to-do list. It is never too late to start. You can not do anything only when you stop trying. Go ahead, if you can’t, then my friend, no one on Earth can!