A friend who knows you can save you.

Everyone to varying extents tackles and overcome mental-health challenges. One way to stay safe is meditation. Meditation can help strengthen the mind, but do you meditate daily? This is where a friend+ – who knows you to the extent that he/she can almost predict what you are thinking or what you would want to do – is a safe backup option to avoid mental illness.

As Charlie Chaplin rightly said, “with technology we have caved in.”

The underlying philosophy

Aristotle has some pretty straightforward views of how ‘we’ in a society work*. Aristotle feels that in a human, or in the society, or the state on its whole state, there is a master-slave relationship. A master orders and a slave executes. And that relationship contributes to the effective functioning of a human and ultimately the entire society.

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A master-slave relationship. Master is the one who has a higher intellectual power and who can guide through commands. The slave, on the other hand, is a person who can use his physical brute force on tasks given by the master. Hence the slave can execute what the master deems necessary. The master and slave need not be humans per se. Master and slave can be the mind and body of oneself.

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Harmony ensures proper functioning. 

I believe that the core source of any form of the illness is when there is a disturbance to the balance. Through the time, knowingly or unknowingly, we might have disturbed this balance.

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Don’t you think that having some food delivery app is a kind of change in the master-slave balance? Back then if we are hungry, we used to cook our food. Then we happened to get restaurants to cook the food for us. Now we have people to get us the food from the hotel. Thereby we have changed the balance as time passed. We think we are empowered to get the job done, but we need to have a greater understanding of the self to maintain the balance.

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Hence this is where I think a friend who can predict your next move can solve that problem for you. 

The perfect backup plan

In many instances in my life, I have allowed the balance to be disturbed. Thus sporadically being affected by mental illnesses. During those times luckily I had a friend who could predict my next move. We are naturally good at analysing others, but sometimes we fail at observing ourselves.

The solution to the very problem I stated is present around us. We, human beings, are modelled to function in groups and societies. That is how we have stood the chance of time and have climbed up through evolution to become the most intelligent species on the planet.

But through time we have become dependent on inanimate objects. The object mentioned here neither has to obey to the master nor has the mind to work towards a desire. (When you expect Siri to get food for you, your body does not do the job, thereby affecting the balance)

Having a friend who knows you well can be a regular check on the balance in the master-slave relationship. You would be taken care of, allowed to be yourself. Now your mind and body work together restoring the balance. I never felt lonely again, and with the friend around me, I was better off at fending off mental-illness right at the start.

It is a win-win scenario.

-Balance is maintained for you and your friend.

-The probability of getting a mental health problem is lesser

-And you will naturally become more resilient

We should not assume that we have the necessary tools and equipment that can help us lead a single prosperous life. You can find one half of happiness in yourself and the remaining through friends or the society. There is so step-by-step process to define how to get such a friend, but an excellent way to start getting such people around you is to be that friend for someone else. 

Continue reading “A friend who knows you can save you.”

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What matters is the missed opportunities.

“Opportunities seldom knock on the door”. Have you come across this quote? On the other hand, I guess the opportunities of the current world knock often.

This tech-age suggests that we can not only create opportunities but also do so when we want to.  Advances in the economy, technology, and education tremendously aid us. Age is no longer a barrier to do what we want to. If you are rejected by a university this year, you can immediately take up one of their courses online thereby never depriving yourself of education from that university. Want to kill zombies or run with dinosaurs, put on a VR headset. Without hitting the gym, you can become stronger than Dwayne Johnson with an exoskeleton suit. These are examples that clearly define this tech-age as a time when opportunities can be made to knock on the door when needed. 

But I feel that more than creating new opportunities, it is the opportunities at hand that matter more. 

Why so? Look at sports.

I was in England during the FIFA World Cup and Wimbledon. This year has given us unexpected and wild twists in both these sporting seasons. Roger Federer walked in like he was about to win his next grand slam. The world-renowned teams like Brazil, England, Germany, and Portugal felt like it would be a battle amongst themselves for the cup. Ultimately at the end that did not happen. The winners of both the sporting season did show exceptional talent. In the pretext of going out there and creating new opportunities, the well-trained and experienced stars missed out a lot and it costed them dearly.

Yes, the opportunities at hand matter more.

But wait a moment. You could argue by saying that there are a lot of examples of people or organisations that have proven to be amazing and successful by creating opportunities for themselves. Apple went ahead by creating the iPod+iTunes combo to rock the music and mp3 player markets. Well, they even created a new market. You can quote many such examples from the business world on how new opportunities defined the growth of organisations. If these are new opportunities created, there must be another side to the story.

That is in the form of a missed opportunity.

If you have a Netflix Subscription, please do watch the first episode of “Genius – Jobs Vs Gates”. In that, you will find that Jobs had a peek at Xerox’s R&D lab. Xerox originally came up with the GUI. Jobs took that and created the Mac. The rest is history. Xerox missed out on the opportunity. 

England could have brought it home, had they shot goals right into the post. There were many a change missed. 

(Watch the video)

So all I ask you is not to miss out on opportunities at hand by assuming that better ones are waiting for you. Do not miss an opportunity. Step-by-step, one utilised opportunity would lead to the other. By doing so, you will dent ‘your’ universe, if not the ‘the’ universe. 

Continue reading “What matters is the missed opportunities.”

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